Baby of Mine

Aubree Christina Riddle

No when to fold em

That's right. We are throwing in the towel on trying to buy a house. We have been FHA discriminated against like many others just like us. Banks won't even allow us to see homes or tell us not to bother to even make an offer because we have an FHA loan. Then we learn that the company we got the loan from will only write the loan for the appraisal of the house, not market value. Therefore, we will consistently be outbid by investors and conventional loans that can increase their offer to market value. The whole process has been so frustrating and we just realize that maybe it just isn't for us right now.

Living conditions will be tried and tested soon as I go into the hospital Tuesday. If it isn't working out then Brent and I have decided to try to rent something. Brent feels really strongly that putting the baby in the trailer through the winter is just not a good idea with so many things going around right now. If we can stick it out till tax time, then we can finish paying off what we had wanted to pay off when moving here and will be in a really good position financially. But that means we really have to make things ok for everyone. Having a baby and moving into the house was never in the cards when we talked to my parents and they have been very patient and willing to work with us through this time. But how long and much can their patience be tried?

We've discussed me going back to work when Ben goes to kinder (although neither of us want to do that, but right now we feel like it will be the only way to buy a home). We realize that we have put ourselves into this position because of years of bad financial decisions and are trying to learn, but every time we come to a crossroads we are terrified of making another bad decision.

Any advice?

You know when your young you think everything will just work out perfectly and of course you are going to have a steady income, house, friends, life, etc. Then you get into your 20's and learn that life really sucks most of the time and you go from making these huge decisions that you have no idea how to answer. When do feel like you finally grow up? I'm ready!

Where I've been

Many friends and family have called me lately to make sure I'm alive. They have missed my blogs and wanted to make sure I was ok. I am if you call 38 weeks pregnant, can't see anything below the waist, can't bend over, not sleeping, back/hips hurting, look like someone should take me out and shoot me ok. Our computer is located on top of a dresser and you have to sit on the edge of the bed to use it. For me lately, doing this is painful and now unthinkable. Even now I sit and type at my parents computer because I can lean back in their chair and pull the keyboard out to me in order to type.

Bree is getting very big. I was asked twice last week if I was having twins (which always tends to happen to me at the end). My doc won't take me at 38 weeks like I'd hoped. There are new hospital policies that say I need an emergency situation to take a baby before 39 weeks. So I have one more week to stick it out. Many think I'm actually in an emergency situation I'm so uncomfortable, and can't believe the hospital won't make an exception.

It's really ok. I'm mentally prepared to go on the 29th. I have made NO plans for next week and plan on spending most of time in bed or on the couch relaxing. The kids have been very understanding and I'm grateful for my girls who are old enough now to get their own water, snacks, and find/pick up their own things. They help Ben and even do a few chores for me like empty the dishwasher (even when they aren't clean) and pull out laundry from the dryer and bring it to me to fold. I have been very proud of them and they are usually really good sports about it. I just hope I'm not scaring Dani for life. I'm afraid she may remember how hard this pregnancy has been and it will scare her off. She has been asking LOTS of big girl questions and I feel like I can be honest with her now that she is older and understand more.
We have discussed the C-section in detail. She was a little nervous for me at first, but I told her I wouldn't be able to feel anything while they did it. She thought it was gross that the doctors would look at my insides. We also talked about what Bree would look like when she came out. That she would be messy and may look a little weird for a few days as her skin adapts to being outside. She asked if I would be hurt after and I explained that I would for a little while. I would also be tired because Bree won't be sleeping all night and I would be up. She asked if she could stay up and help, but I encouraged her that she really needed to get her sleep so she could help me during the daytime.

Hannah is so excited and loves to touch all of the baby things. She is so loving and I can't wait to see her with Bree. She always gets me water or will run and grab things for me. She also helps if I drop something and can't seem to reach it.

Ben loves to tell people that there is a baby in mommy's belly named, "Aubee Tina." He talks to my belly often and says hello to her. I ask him if he is going to be a good big brother and he always says yes. The girls remind him constantly that he will have to be VERY careful around the baby when she comes out.

Brent seems to be impatient, as am I. He wants his wife back and I don't blame him. I'm pretty useless now and it's been a little harder for him now that I can't move very quickly. We are almost done though and can't wait for our last little one to arrive.

Bean Festival

Every year Tracy has their Bean Festival. I haven't always gone because it's mostly food and businesses trying to get you to sign up for things. This year though Brent was going to be open and I was looking at a long weekend home by myself with the kids. I decided to meet some friends downtown to check it out.

Brent handed out otter pops for free. I think my kids ate most of them. They had three each before lunch.

Brent is ready to go!

The kids enjoyed walking around and playing games.

There was even a kids area with free games, crafts, bubbles, and face painting.

I was grateful my parents showed up and walked around more with the kids. I was able to get a Gerard's Deli sandwich and sit in one of Brent's recliners outside while I visited with people. I got a few dirty looks from people who thought I was just abusing Brent's chair, but I didn't care and neither did he. He had a great day, very busy and then decided to close Sunday because he didn't have help. It was very good for the store and the kids got to get out of the house.

Traditional Giants Game

Every year for my mom's birthday, dad takes the family to a San Francisco Giants game. It is my mom's favorite place on earth and she really enjoys taking the kids and sharing her favorite past time with them. The kids also love it. Danielle actually said, "finally!" when we told them we were going to game, like she had been waiting forever to go. I, being in my last month of pregnancy, was afraid that I wasn't going to be able to go. But Brent offered to drive me over (with Ben, Adam, and Ashleigh) and we were able to park pretty close to the park.

The view from McCovey Cove. It was so pretty!

My parents took the girls on Bart, so we met them at the front of the stadium.

Danielle and Mom with mom's favorite player, Lincecum.

One of the players is called Kung Fu Panda because he's huge. Each of the kids were given a panda bear to waive around while we were there.

We had such a good time. The Giants won and it was a great game. Brent and I took all of the kids home with Adam and Ashleigh so mom and dad could go to dinner in the city. Everyone fell asleep on the way home, so we had a nice quiet drive. It turned out to be a really nice day.

Ugghh

I spoke too soon.

The good stuff

In the last few days we have looked at 5 homes, put offers on two, recieved a free crib, and a free washer/dryer. Hopefully things are looking up!